Today's short lesson on MeTaL:
The metal band 'Arch Enemy' is a pretty popular band as far as metal is concerned. Hailing from Sweden and being founded by Carcass guitarist Michael Amott gives them +2 where metal is concerned. They have been through a few line-up changes over the years but have settled on their front-woman (that’s right, a woman!) being Angela Gossow [link] . Having a hottie screaming your lyrics for your metal band is usually a plus, especially if she always wears football player chalk under her eyes and is German so you know you can hot Carl her if you want. All this being said you would expect a pretty kick ass group. Leave it up to horrible LYRICS to totally ruin this band. "Lyrics?" you ask, 'who cares about lyrics in metal, most of the time she is growling'. True enough. But lets break it down. The metal growl isn't something anyone can do. Sounds weird, but there is actually an art to getting it just right. Madam Gossow, quite frankly sucks at the metal growl. I don't really want to go into this much more, but basically she just ruins every awesome intro that the band throws down as soon as she starts. Secondly, an example of the horrible lyrics:
*music music music* music stops, she screams "die die die", *music music music* Really?
Fucking awesome lyrics lady, you find that in 'Metal Lyrics for Dummies, a stylistic guide to SuckFailing at writing metal lyrics' ?
In summation, the extremely well oiled machine that makes up the instrumental part of the band has a gigantic fucking monkey wrench thrown in the cogs as soon as Madam Gossow starts her death growl and then couples it with embarrassingly horrible lyrics. I hope you've enjoyed our time together, stay tuned, next week we will be covering the breakdown, how fucking awesome it is, and why it makes you want to punish everyone around you for not loving it more.